mutedtempest: (Default)
[personal profile] mutedtempest
As my planned departure date (Thursday, the 6th) gets closer, I can't help but consider staying in PiteƄ anyway.

I'm not manic, and I'm trying to be realistic and responsible. Yes, my caseworker said he suggests I travel home, but I'm legally allowed to stay until an official decision is made on my case. It seems a bit silly to throw away 9000kr in rent money for the 3 months I won't be here, as well as over 1000US on a plane ticket if there's no true, legal reason for me to leave.

On top of that, when I get home I'll be expected to pay rent. Perhaps I'm a cheap bastard but paying rent on two places, one of which I don't live in, seems pretty ridiculous. My landlord has given me back three months of advance rent that I paid, and I could easily stay here this summer and live on that 9000kr. I have a little bit left in the bank as well, and my rent is paid up through August. My energy bill is paid. All I would really need to buy would be food, internet, and to put some money on my phone. If I'm careful, I can easily make it work.

If I go home, I will be forfeiting the 9000kr in rent money between now and September. I will also be spending over 1000US on a ticket home. There's no guarantee that I'll be able to find a job immediately upon my return, and even if I do, I highly doubt I'll be able to save up more over the summer than the over 2000USD I'd be throwing away to get back there in the first place.

Yes, they could still deny me at any time. That's really the one risk I run by staying. But even I said, it's legal for me to be here while awaiting their decision. And I' still scared that if I go now and show my documentation at Arlanda, they're gonna get pissy with me for having no official decision with me, and might ban me anyway. But since I'm legal to be here while they're deciding, I may as well just wait for an official decision before trying to travel home anyway. For some reason, I just have a very bad feeling about trying to fly home with no documentation.

EDIT: Just spoke to my grandfather, and he thinks I should stay until I hear something official. He agrees that it'd be a huge waste of money to fly home when my rent is paid here, and he says the job market in my hometown really sucks. Even if I do manage to land a temp job or a fast food gig, I wouldn't be able to make back the money I'd be throwing away by flying home now. He also says that if they do send a denial over the summer and I can't afford a flight, he'll make sure I can get home.

Okay, well, that pretty much settles it in my mind. The more I think about it, the less sense it makes to try to go home now. I was told, by my caseworker at Migrationsverket, that I'm legal to be here while the decision is being made. I'm going to call and double check this tomorrow, but if it's true (and everything I've read and heard says it is) I can't get in trouble for staying until they decide.

I love Pite. I feel at home here. I've never felt that way about any other place on Earth except for Edinburgh, and all of Scotland. But while I had an emotional connection there, I didn't have the personal connection with so many new friends that I've made here. I don't want to leave, and I'm not going to until I absolutely have to.


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