I really fucking hate not being rich.

So, I was doing some more reading on what it'll take for me to be able to go to school in Sweden. I find out that I have to show proof of support not when I enter the country, but when I apply for my residence permit.

This is a problem, mostly because I am fucking poor. I mean, I had to do this when I applied to go to the UK, but it was a lot closer to when I went. I could hold off and apply in like July or whatever, but...meh. I just don't know and it scares me.

This January, I will receive $5,000 from my school, which will be deposited directly into my bank account in the US. That's more than half what I need, so that's a plus. If I can be good and not spend any of that and deposit UK money into it every time I get paid, it'll be very very close if not over.

Also, I do qualify for federal loans even though I'm applying for a foreign school. This is really good, since it means that I'll get money from the Feds. Graduate students get $20,500 a year, and that's yay, because even though there's no tuition in Sweden I'll still get loans for living expenses. Also, I can work there. I don't speak the language so I'll have to scrub toilets or whatever but work is work. I can get a nice fancy cushy job when I'm done.

There are private loans too, but I can't do much with those because there's no way any of my credit-worthy relatives will sign for them. It sucks, too, because if they did help me out and co-sign, I could get $50,000 no problem. Sigh.

I'm going to work my ass off and make this happen. I can get two jobs, maybe three if I need to. The exchange rate from pounds to dollars is really nice right now, so I have that in my favor. As long as I can work hard and lots of hours and get paid and keep sending money to the US, I can do it. I just have to live frugally, not that it's really a problem for me to do that. I'm used to living very cheap.

I think maybe I can do this. I just really have to be careful with money. And not really sleep. I'm gonna be so fucking exhausted. lol.

My family officially fucking sucks

Okay. Earlier today I got an email from my bank back home. I had overdrawn the account by a whole dollar, because the hostel that I stayed at ended up charging me on my debit card instead of taking a cash payment like they'd said they would. But meh, I figured it's only a dollar, no biggie.

I emailed my grandpa to see if he would pay the bank enough to get it back in the positive for me for a few days until I can get the money transferred from my Scottish bank account. He refused, saying that "if you didn't have the money in your account, you shouldn't have used it."

Well no shit sherlock, thanks for the advice. In the meantime, Visa charges me $25 EVERY DAY that I'm overdrawn. It'll take a least a couple days before the money is transferred, and guess what? I'll still be overdrawn when it is because my grandpa's being an ass.

Sigh. it's not as if I enjoy being poor. And then when I called him today and told him i dont have a lot of international minutes and needed to keep it short, he kept lecturing me and i wasted 20 or my minutes listening to that bullshit. "you're finding out it's hard to live on your own, aren't you?" and shit like that.

Meh. I wish I could just win the lottery or something dumb like that.