school woes

Jun. 7th, 2010 07:54 pm
mutedtempest: (Default)
[personal profile] mutedtempest
I know it's my own fault for staying in this program, but dear Lord. I have never felt so inferior in my entire life. I know I should take it easier on myself since I do have brain damage that affects my computational skills and in my defense I didn't realize this stuff would be quite so computer intensive, but...gah.

The thing that upsets me most is that it's not impossible to understand. The last course took me 9 months, but I WAS eventually able to work it out for myself. I will with this one too, it's just incredibly frustrating that it takes so freaking long to grasp it.

I know people think I'm lazy and that I never study, mostly because I want them to think that. That way, they can't look down on me for being stuck on one equation for 3 months. In reality, I spend hours every day reading my textbooks over and over again, writing notes in longhand in my notebooks, typing page after page of them on the computer and reading them aloud to myself in hopes that something will click. Sometimes it does, but if so it takes forever.

I've completed one assignment. I signed up for 100% temp, and I'm supposed to be done by June 30th. I want to be, and I can be ambitious and think that I'll do one exercise per day. Really, I just hope I'm somewhere close to that deadline this time.
Anonymous( )Anonymous This account has disabled anonymous posting.
OpenID( )OpenID You can comment on this post while signed in with an account from many other sites, once you have confirmed your email address. Sign in using OpenID.
Account name:
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
HTML doesn't work in the subject.


Notice: This account is set to log the IP addresses of everyone who comments.
Links will be displayed as unclickable URLs to help prevent spam.


mutedtempest: (Default)

July 2016

345 6789

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Oct. 17th, 2017 04:41 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios